As women all over the world battle to rise to top
positions in politics and other spheres of life, most Nigerian women
are also taking over the headship of homes. This is attested by the
large number of women who are now bread winners against the order of God
and nature.
Mrs. Cecilia Adaudu from Benue state is a
lecturer with one of the nation’s polytechnic and speaking to leadership
on the role of women at home, the mother of three said” for the past
8years, I have been the bread winner in my home. My husband is also a
teacher but he never brings his money home. It is always one need or the
other, most times his family burdens are more important than our own.
He drinks and smokes and naturally spends the money outside.
Another woman who is also
shouldering the needs of the family is Mrs. Abigail Ishaya, a trader and
she said “I have been the bread winner in my family since I got married
over 19years ago. I sell foodstuff in Nyanya market. The only thing he
does is to buy like a bag of rice once in a while, but I buy the soup
ingredients and other things in the house. I also pay most of the school
fees; sometimes he will give half of the fees and tell me to balance
it. It was my late father that gave me money to start this business when
he saw the suffering I was going through in my matrimonial home. I
would have gone to further my education because I have only a school
cert and we got married when I was just 19years old. But I can’t because
the children are in school and I have to pay their fees. It is not
easy. There are times I curse the day I got married, it has brought me
nothing but only pains and suffering. My mates who furthered their
education come to buy foodstuff form me and when I see how good they are
doing, I feel so ashamed. My only consolations are my kids”.
‘’Even though some people are beginning to
accept it as a norm, many women find it painful and frustrating, they
detest being the bread winners and that is the cause of many problems in
marriages nowadays. I have counsel many women who are in this situation
and most of them are unhappy. That is why many women are beginning to
leave their husbands because in most cases, they will suffer and bring
in the money, but the man will use the same money to chase women
outside’’ Mrs Adebisi said.
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